For everyone else who is still with me, the following is my reaction to the constant running news feed of THE POPE! MY GOD, THE POPE!
I listen to a lot of NPR, and so it's been near impossible to escape even one minute of this Very Important News Story and its eyeroll-inducing gravitas. Case in point:
NPR journalist: "This is an historic event with far-reaching consequences!"
Commentary from man on the street: "I think this is a courageous decision. The Pope has always been courageous and will continue to be courageous for the rest of his life."
Commentary from woman on the street: "I feel abandoned! The Pope is abandoning us!"
NPR reporter: "The Pope first made this announcement to his Cardinals in Latin, many of whom did not immediately understand him."
Yes, there is no better way to insist that you are still totally relevant in 2013 than by saying it in a language that has been dead for thousands of years.
Now if you'll excuse me, all this eye rolling has given me a headache. Or maybe it's God smiting me. Either way, it's nothing that a little Advil shouldn't be able to handle.
*Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem, bitches