Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Why I'm some kind of vehicle

Things I have unintentionally done or said today that have made complete strangers laugh at me:

1. Heaved an unconscious though apparently dramatic sigh while stuck in traffic in the car with the windows down, and the light turned red without anyone moving again.

2. At the doctor's, responded to the question "Are you sexually active?" with a frown and a "Not very." What? I have discriminating tastes. (Ok, not really.) 

In other news, I have pre-emptively set up my OkCupid account for DC and am already corresponding with a few guys. One in particular caught my eye with his description of who he was looking for on his profile: someone "tall, smart, liberal, and laid back." It didn't necessarily hit me in a, hey, that's me! way, but more in a hey, that's what I'm looking for too! way. So at least we know we're both looking for the same thing. Plus, the one e-mail I've received from him so far was peppered with phrases like "cavalcade of schlock" and "a rather insidious bind." I know, I know, not everyone's cup of tea, but to me? Dreamboat.

In other other news, someone finally decided to rent an apartment to me! (Sucker.) Yes, just in the nick of time, the good news arrived after weeks of being passed over and receiving e-mails that all started, "After a very difficult decision, we have decided to go with another applicant." (And who knew apartment hunting would start to feel so much like dating?) I dug up these pictures of it online:

In the place of this person's lovely and tastefully chosen furniture (complete with decorative swan) you will have to imagine the cavernous void composed of all the furniture I don't own. The furniture I do own? A bed. A desk. Not even a chair for the desk; just the desk. And that's pretty much it. The furniture I don't own could fill volumes. Or, you know, a very spartan one bedroom apartment. (Not to mention that I don't own a single wood-carved fowl of any kind, without which my apartment will clearly be incomplete.) So, yes, the moving process continues to be not at all difficult or stressful in any way. Also, the truck my parents were going to bring up to help me move is no longer, you know, trucking, or something. I'm fuzzy on the details. But no truck. Surprise! So, let's just rent a truck then, on the busiest moving weekend of the whole year. In a college town! And try to reserve it three days in advance! (The answer to that is no, by the way.) So, again: totally not complicated or in any way anxiety-inducing. Am calm, zen cucumber.

What's that, a cucumber shaped like a duck?! Well that just sort of ties it all together, doesn't it?


  1. Before I read any of your thoughts about the place I was going to say that you should stalk the current tenant and beg them to leave you the bird!

  2. Looks like a lovely apartment, whether or not you have furniture. Good luck with the move - oh, and with finding a wood-carved fowl.

  3. If you decorate your new place with any type of carved floor bird, I will personally hunt down your apartment, break off a piece of that bird and beat the rest of it with itself.

    Do not test me, I am insane. (But also, really REALLY lazy. So I will never actually do more than want to do this.)

    Hey, congratulations!

  4. Congrats on finding a place! Looks cute!

    And believe me, I WISH I owned just a bed and a desk. It would make moving once a year (which seems to be the new trend in my life) so much easier. Now when I buy furniture of any kind, I imagine how easy it will be to take apart and haul in the back of a minivan.

  5. I'm so glad that I found your blog oh so many years ago. I *heart* you.

  6. Damn, that apartment looks awesome. Tell them to leave the furniture. I cannot believe you found a place that nice in DC. I love it!

  7. LOVE the new place. Exactly the kind I would want to move to. Ohhh DC, city of my dreams....

  8. I'm confused by the kitchen. Does it have two dishwashers, or is one of them a washing machine?

  9. Yay on the apt! Did you end up going with D.C. or a suburb?

  10. That apartment looks awesome! It's my dream to have in-house laundry, sigh. And who needs a swan when you have cucumber duck? Just get that shit shellacked!

    (I also love the window into the kitchen, totally cool.)

  11. walking here with a smile.. have a nice day ~ =D

    Regards, (A Growing Teenager Diary) ..