Monday, May 16, 2011

Why girlfriends are a girl's best friend

So Blogger fell down, knocking down millions of blog posts in the process, and then it got back up again, and now it swears that it has put everyone's posts back right where it found them, except, hello, not everyone's, Blogger! Not everyone's! No, you haven't! And the version saved in my draft folder was only half the original post, so this is my painstaking recreation of that post. Comments have gone missing, too, even the one in which commenter Erin called me gorgeous, intelligent, and beautiful, and I may never forgive Blogger for this, not ever. 

Any single girl knows the importance of having single girlfriends. Even if they don't live in the same town, or even the same state, they're always just a phone call away to commiserate about the latest heartbreak. They make great travel partners, and they're always willing to lend you the other half of their bed to crash on when you're in town. And I had some awesome single girlfriends. (Note ominous foreshadowing...)

...Then, of course, Molly went to Spain and fell for her Spanish siren.

And then Erin went monogamous.

This all happened a couple years ago, and since then, life and friendships have pretty much continued on as usual. I visited Molly in Spain and New Jersey, and I hang out with Erin in Philly when I can. And though they're no longer single, they are still some pretty rockin' friends.  

And besides, I still had my friend Canaan on my side, and my girls Jamie and Julia. And among their many endearing qualities, I definitely appreciated that these ladies were always up for a trip.

In 2007, Jamie, Jules and I all went to Martha's Vineyard together.

Then Jamie moved to Seattle and Julia moved to Zambia, but nonetheless, we still managed a whirlwind camping trip on Assateague Island last summer.

Then there was the time I spent Thanksgiving with Jamie in Seattle, and then our trip to San Francisco a few months ago.

(We may have tasted some wine there. Me and my purple tongue will never tell.)

And then there's Canaan, who may have single-handedly saved me from loneliness and desperation during a year when I was otherwise all alone in France. By some lucky twist of fate, Canaan was living a few hours train ride away from me that year, and we were able to spend all the major holidays together--I visited her in Grenoble over Thanksgiving (not even a holiday in France! So we made it up!), she was kind enough to invite me along to visit some friends of hers in the north for Christmas, and she and some other friends came to Paris for New Year's.

 Thanksgiving in Grenoble
 Christmas on the beach in Normandy
 NYE in Paris

Then, as if that wasn't enough quality time together, I convinced her to travel to Spain with me in February. 
(Sadly, this is the closest we came to getting both of us in the same picture there.)

Yes, it was a good time for girlfriends. 

But lately, things have been changing, as things tend to do. Chatting with Jamie online, I mentioned that Facebook seemed to imply that Julia was involved with a handsome Zambian man, or at least they were appearing in an awful lot of pictures together. "Yes!" she replied. "She's engaged!" 

"What?" I said. "Wait, what?!"

As it turned out, the rumors were true, I confirmed with the bride-to-be later. Jamie herself is currently smitten with a man she met on Okcupid, to the point of being in L-word (I can't, I just can't bring myself to say it).

And Canaan? Well, I had to laugh when I came across this comment that she left on a blog post about rejection I wrote just eight short months ago:
"I was seriously just thinking today that maybe I should just give up on the whole dating/love/marriage idea and just end the [family] lineage with myself. Or find some random guy to impregnate me at the right time. (Although statistics say it's not great to raise a kid with one parent. But I'm trying!) So I totally hear your rant today. I feel like a kind of alien reject. Come visit me so we can cry woe is us together!"
Do I even have to tell you that Canaan and her boyfriend are moving in together next week?

If there's one thing I have learned from all this it's that being friends with me is great for your love life. Also, all of my future vacations are about to become 100% less interesting. 

Lastly, because it seems appropriate:

All the single ladies? Hello, all the single ladies? Put your hands up, please, I can't see you. Yup, that's what I thought. I guess from here on out, this is going to be me:

(In case I wasn't clear enough, I didn't mean that from now on I am going to be perpetually hazy and out of focus, or Canadian, not that there's anything wrong with that.)


  1. Smitten or not, I will always travel with you, sweet Rach. Also, I had to do something- you don't cuddle.

  2. Yeah, I hear you... in the same boat over here. I need me some more single girl friends. They're dwindling. Booourns.

  3. "If there's one thing I have learned from all this, it's that being friends with me is great for your love life." Bet I could prove that theory wrong! ;-)

  4. Yep, girlfriends are good. And really important! I'm single, but also an old lady on the other side of the world. :-)

  5. I haven't seen that many pictures of you so I didn't realize how gorgeous you are! You are beautiful and intelligent, who are these schmucks that are passing on you?

  6. Well, don't despair too much, Rachel. As a married woman, let me tell you, I don't forget my girlfriends. Most of them happen to be married, too, but we still need each other and your now hooked-up friends still need you.

  7. I second my original comment.

  8. The same thing happened to me, Rachel! Annoying, isn't it?

  9. Blogger is a big, fat liar! I have loads of missing comments and an entire post that disappeared and never came back. Pft.

    I'm also called Erin. And I, too, think you're beautiful and intelligent. These boys you've had the misfortune of getting involved with are idiots.

  10. I lost comments but not a blog post annoying...

    ALso I thought I saw you TWICE yesterday in Melbourne. and I was all "RACHEL...oh wait."

    And you're totally gorgeous.

  11. Well...need I remind you that I was single for, like, 10 years? So maybe you are my lucky charm, and if you are thank you. The problem with being in this position is, I can't give pep talks anymore, it sounds annoying. But I just want to be an inspiring example that yes, us picky people CAN find someone they like for realsies! Yes, it may feel like you'll be single forever but it can happen, even to people who feel like that! Keep on, be patient. But like I said, I can't give pep talks anymore. So sad...

  12. If I were single, I would totally be one of your single friends. Instead I'm married, so let's just pretend I'm not shall we? Because I like living the vicarious single life. Ahh, grass is always greener.

    Oh, and I totally second the first Erin's comment!

  13. ;fjka;lkdjfa;sdlkfja;sdklf you're an anal comment whore. That's hilare.

    by the way, I'm totally single (but no one is surprised)

  14. I'm in a relationship wishing I was single!! Lol