Sunday, January 27, 2008

Why machines will rule the Earth

You know things are looking bad for humans when technology has developed that subtle blend of mockery and wry humor that so many of us strive for, and uses it against you.

Case in point: When I write text messages, my cell phone likes to guess at what I'm going to say next by ever so helpfully throwing in a word or two when it thinks it might have a good idea at where the conversation is going. It has never once been correct, and I always have to go back to delete its suggestion. Last night I was going to meet a friend for a drink. A friend, if you must know, and he reads this blog (hey T!), but a friend nonetheless. Standing at the bus stop, I opened my phone to send him a text indicating that he should meet me in fifteen minutes.

Bus is here, meet me in

bed! said my phone.

Oh ho, phone, aren't you so clever! Think you're being funny, don't you phone?

So apparently things are so bad around here that even my phone thinks I need to get laid. Although if my microwave starts insulting me too I'm really going to be worried.

Be nice to your appliances, people, it seems that the robotic uprising is already upon us. (Binary solo! Zero zero zero zero zero zero one...)


  1. I vote for listening to your phone next time!


  2. I knew nothing good could come of all this technology. Cell phones, iPods, computers ... I can't send a text message to save my life. Why, when I was a boy we read the newspaper in the firelight, and we never even thought about sex, the devil's business! I miss President McKinley. He was a good man.

  3. Hm, I don't know if you're exactly impartial, BTDT.

  4. Eh, listen to your phone. So much experimentation, research, development, marketing, and technology went into that phone that I bet it probably knows best.

  5. C'mon, Mona ...Mulva ... Jen ... whatever you're calling yourself these days. We want a new post! We're hungry for funny and sweet.

  6. I hate when life gets in the way of blogging. It makes me sad. New post, tonight, I promise. Tomorrow night, at the outside latest.